Day 20

A picture of something you wish you could forget.




Actually, I don't mind remembering how much it hurt to get this bruise. Because of it, I felt "hard core," earned bragging rights, and learned to let go of the rope sooner. It's one of those painful things that I wouldn't want to go through again, but all the same I'm glad I did.

Really, I just don't like forgetting things- even the times that are most painful or embarrassing. If I forget, I'll forget the lesson. Besides, these are parts of my life- if I were to blot them out of my memory, it would be less complete, less varied and expansive.

I used to think it wasn't fair that we remember our sins after we've been washed clean through repentance while Christ remembers them no more (Jeremiah 31:34). Why couldn't we all just forget and have them disappear completely?
That would miss the point. Repentance is a path toward changing, growing, overcoming. By remembering we keep ourselves from falling back into old habits and we can be gentler with others going through similar tough times.

Found this on someone else's blog, and it touched me. An interesting perspective.
(http://lamont-uphill.blogspot.com/2011/02/day-21-something-i-wish-i-could-forget.html):

"Forget.
Not because it was bad.
Not because I wish it never was.
Not because it wasn't a precious time with good people.

But because it's something I find myself missing so much.
If I could forget the loss, remembering would not be so difficult."

New Year, New Post

So here's one New Year's Resolution I should probably make: update my blog every once in a while! Yup, this is my first post in... well, too long. Lots has happened since then!

I won't fill you in; I'm starting fresh with 2011.

But first, a few pics from Christmas Break! (These are the later ones that didn't make it onto Facebook. I have dozens more if you're interested!)

Hanging out in the New House (SOOO many movies- what else can you do when it's cold & dark starting at 5:00 pm?)





Hiking/Scrambling Ice Box Canyon with Chris & Joseph. River Road to the Slickrock Bike Trail in just over an hour of near-vertical ascent. At points, we had to use ropes, NRS strap-belt harnesses, or climb on railroad spikes someone pounded into the rock. Awesome!




Christmas Eve Nazarene Feast ("hippie food" courtesy of yours truly ;)






Slush & Shanghai: a Hazlett Holiday Tradition








A fun visit by the 5 crazy Coleman cousins :)







Snow on the red rock (view from the Sand Hill where we went sledding & even got the Andrews' van stuck!)





Two cutest baby sisters. Check out Holly's dance moves! ;)







New Year's Eve party w/the Singles' Branch








I have rather goofy (but attractive!) best friends ;)









And a very cute baby sister who loves to play outside in the snow with me!

So basically, LIFE IS GOOD! And I love being home.

BYU Winter semester classes started today, but I am kind of not missing it at all. I needed a break from school and the Provo bubble, to be honest. Now I am excited to spend time with my family & friends at home for a few weeks before heading out into the wilderness to explore a potential career option and get some real-world experience.

Besides, see what I would have had to leave behind?

Dreams

Turns out that when I immerse myself in poetry just before bedtime, I wake up to very vivid and memorable dreams. Perhaps accessing my subconscious while conscious means that it is wide awake and ready to mull over what I'm really feeling as I sleep.

I don't believe all the "dream symbols" and other horoscope-ish stuff. However, I can definitely detect patterns and recognize symbols in my own dreams- and even interpret them- because I know what they mean to me. They could be totally different from someone else, because the sum total of my life is very different from everyone else's.

Come to think of it, I can't remember the last time I had a true nightmare.

I think dreams provide insight into what you feel deep down- what you are afraid of, what you know, what you won't admit to yourself- that your conscious, rational self refuses to acknowledge while you are awake. When that logical part is sleeping, the raw feelings and memories, thoughts, etc. can untangle themselves. Dreams are those fleeting glimpses into how you really feel about things.

Interesting... I think I will have to sleep on this thought ;)